With or Without You
by xxFallingSkiesxx
Summary: Sometimes in life, you do something thinking that you were only protecting the one that you loved. When she left John, Taylor took a big secret with her. Will John ever know the truth?


Walking past his locker room, a wave of immense guilt boiled in her stomach, like magma in a volcano. It had been three months since she ended it with him. Taylor told him she was sick of trying to be happy with him; she couldn't try to make them work anymore. The blonde had fallen out of love with him.

John was confused and stunned; he had no clue anything was remotely wrong in their four year relationship, let alone that Taylor Helmsley didn't love him anymore. The look that the blue eyed man had after Taylor uttered those words and turned her back on him still haunted her to this day. The way the light faded in his eyes, and his dimples that Taylor loved so much disappeared.

The eldest Helmsley daughter held her breath and went to knock; John had been ignoring her and avoiding her ever since that day. If John really knew the truth, he'd understand why she had to do what she did. Taylor only hoped he'd answer her and not send her away. Raising her unusually pale hand, she went to softly knock, but the door opened as if John knew who stood on the other side.

His light blue eyes sparkled in happiness, and just as quickly turned a dark shade of blue. The only times Taylor ever saw that was when he was extremely pissed off, or turned on, and the shorter blonde knew he wasn't the latter. The Cenation Leader looked over Taylor, and took in her appearance.

Sure he had missed her, hell it killed him watching her walk around the arenas or do interviews as if they never happened. What really killed was when he found out she had gone on dates with Randy; his supposed to be best friend. Needless to say, he and the Viper weren't exactly on speaking terms right now.

"He…hey John," her soft voice knocked him out of his thoughts. The six-foot-one man tried keeping his composure and tried to hide his worry; the Taylor he knew never looked this weak. As a matter of fact, he knew she wasn't eating; Haley DiBiase had told him and it immediately struck him as odd that she was the one hurting. Then again, maybe something else was wrong.

_"It doesn't matter anymore. She stopped loving you; she doesn't deserve your love," _the older man tried telling himself. The two were stuck looking into each other's eyes as John evenly responded,

"Hello Taylor. What are you doing here?"

The girl wrapped her arms tightly around her midsection, and John wondered if she had some sort of stomach virus. As she did, John couldn't help but notice she was wearing his old Chain Gang hoodie, and it broke his heart further. Pushing a piece of blonde hair behind her ear, Taylor tried to find the right words; although lately she never could find them.

"I needed to talk to you and was about to knock, but you beat me to the punch…" she tried joking, but his displeased look stopped her chuckle, "Can I come in?"

John thought for a moment, but then stepped aside,

"Why not; I need to ask you a few things anyway."

Nodding, the former Woman's Champion looked around. Immediately an old picture caught her eye; one of them on his birthday this past year. The whole roster surprised him with a party, courtesy of Taylor. Randy had snapped a picture of them in the middle of the floor, slow dancing, and the couple didn't know until Randy gave her the picture on her birthday this year. It broke her heart to see how far they had fallen.

Maybe she should've told John the truth; he had every right to know. Yet somehow she felt as if he'd resent them, and that she couldn't handle.

_"This is for the best," _Taylor tried convincing herself as she ran her hand over her stomach as the silence became deafening. Turning around, John stood there with his cerulean blue eyes just watching her, as if she were a ghost.

"Johnny? Are you okay there?"

The old nickname only added to his anger, and he spit out,

"That's a really stupid question don't you think Taylor? Oh, and don't call me that either alright?"

The usually jovial man acting this way was shocking; then again you couldn't really blame the man.

Keeping her composure, Taylor nodded and began talking,

"That's fair enough. Listen John, I'm sorry about all of this. I never meant to hurt you, I can stop by your house and get all my things if you'd like."

Taylor refused to look at John, and the former WWE Champion felt like turning a table over; but he's not that kind of guy. As much as he hated it sometimes, he never lost his cool. Walking past her, John rested against the back wall.

"What I'd like, really? Since when do you care about what I want baby? I mean after four years you end us with no God damn explanation? Oh and then you get with my best friend? That really shows how much you care Taylor."

John's voice grew higher and harsher with each word. Tears became pins in her blue eyes, and Taylor finally looked at the man she had loved. The woman didn't know what hurt worse; the fact they ended, or that for even a split moment John believed her bullshit reason. After four years, and all the highs and lows, she thought the man knew her better than that.

"Dammit John, I do care! Don't you get it; that's why I had to do what I did!" Taylor's voice shook and her stomach began cramping; grunting at the sharp pains, she figured it was normal. Walking closer, her head too began pounding.

John's heart began pounding as he saw Taylor stumbling over her feet, and he pushed himself off of the wall, and walked until he stood right in front of her.

"Taylor, are you okay?"

She pushed his hand off,

"I'm fine! Why do you care? You're the one who has been acting as if I don't exist. I love how much you care."

John glared at her; he couldn't believe Taylor thought that, what right did she have to jump to these shitty conclusions?

Rolling his eyes, the muscular man replied,

"Right Taylor; I never cared. That's why I was going to propose to you! I bought a ring and had the whole thing planned out," Taylor's eyes widened and the room slowly began spinning as the pains in her stomach increased.

Soon the blonde girl realized it wasn't normal like she had thought. She couldn't believe he was going to propose; she felt like a fool at this point.

Clumsily turning around, she began to walk away. As John's hand wrapped around her wrist, his blue eyes shown with concern and his deep voice boomed,

"Taylor, you're not leaving me this time; not without explaining why I wasn't enough for you anymore. Randy is my best bud, but really? You could've chose to hurt me any other way-"

Taylor shook her head, and wiped the mixture of tears and sweat from under her eyes. This wasn't what she had planned, but she needed to leave, get to the hospital.

"J…Johnny…I need to go. My stomach is cramping….the…hospital." Taylor choked out, and John knew that all along something else was wrong. Taylor's eyes began drooping closed, and her body fell limply in John's arms. Looking down, John noticed blood was staining the inner thighs of Taylor's jeans. Not sure what was happening, John tried shaking her,

"Oh my God, you're bleeding. Taylor, pretty girl open those blue eyes okay? Just please stay with me, I….I don't know how to be alone, without you."

Taylor's eyes slowly opened, and using a large hand, John pushed the hair back from her face.

"You're SuperCena, you'll be okay Johnny."

Picking her up bridal style, John kissed her forehead.

"Even Superman needed his Lois Lane."

Closing her eyes, Taylor's body then went still. Holding her close to his body, John ran out into the arena hall, yelling for help.

Haley and Ted soon ran up and the married couple immediately agreed to drive to the hospital. Haley was Taylor's best friend, and she knew why Taylor was making the choices she had. The brunette only wished that Taylor would listen to her body more often.

The ride to the hospital was silent; no words honestly could change anything, or make the situation any lighter. As Ted drove, Haley's eye met John's in the mirror.

The Massachusetts native was whispering words into her hair, tears slowly falling from his eyes. He didn't even care that some of her blood had moved onto his clothing as well. John Cena was currently the picture of a broke man.

"John, she still loves you, you know."

Haley's firm voice caught John's attention. All he could do was accept the daughter of the Heartbreak Kid's words, and hold Taylor closer to his muscular body.

Several minutes later, John sat in the chair on Taylor's side of the bed. They both were stable, but still needed to wake up. The words the doctor spoke played over in the man's head,

_"Both Taylor and the baby are fine. It seems as if this was her body's way of dealing with the stress. For the last five months of her pregnancy I want her taking it easy, and on bed rest."_

Running a hand through his buzzed-cut hair, the man let out a sigh. Taylor was pregnant. He was going to be a father. At four months gone, John knew the baby was his. Taylor wasn't the cheating kind, and he finally got Haley to admit the truth. This was the reason the love of his life had left him. So many questions whirled through the blue eyed man's head, but they didn't seem to matter as soon as her heard her voice.

"SuperCena, always saving me," Taylor murmured as she carefully set up in the white bed.

Looking up at her, John didn't know whether to be relieved or pissed off that she hadn't told him.

"Yeah, luckily I was there this time. Were you ever going to tell me, or was I going to have a kid I never knew about?"

John asked as he tried his best to keep his cool.

Taylor didn't know how exactly to respond, so she tried the best she could.

"I don't know. John I lied to you; I never fell out of love with you. God, I've been in various forms since I first met you. I just…I found out I was pregnant and I knew how much you loved this business-"

"You thought I loved this business more than you? Than our family; how the hell could you?"

The way John said 'our family' so softly, broke Taylor's heart. Tears began falling, and she sobbed,

"I was scared. I didn't want you to regret us. I didn't want to be the reason you walked away from your life."

John Cena didn't know how to respond. The man was strong, but all if this hurt him, not that he was one to ever admit a thing. Choking back a sob, John ranted,

"Dammit Taylor, are you blind? You are my life! While you were unconscious, I thought maybe you weren't coming back to me. I don't give a damn about this business if I had to be without you. After four years, I cannot believe you thought I'd just walk out on you and our baby."

Taylor calmed down, and soon a silence washed over them. The only sounds made were breathing and pounding heartbeats.

Taylor carefully cleared her throat and whispered, "Our son."

Snapping his head up, John couldn't help but grin. If possible, he fell more in love with Taylor right there.

"Did you just say our son? We're having a baby boy?"

Nodding, Taylor reached out and wiped his tears. John kissed her palm softly, and then leaned in and kissed Taylor on the lips.

Soon Taylor and John's tongues were fighting for dominance, and it was John who pulled away.

"What happened with you and Randy?

Taylor smiled, and John could help but smile back.

"He's just been holding my hand through all of this. He's my best guy friend; he's always been there for us John. So take your ass and apologize to him.

John let out a deep laugh, and Taylor's heart swelled at the sight of his dimples finally showing,

"God, there you go talking about my ass. In a hospital nonetheless too Taylor," the WWE Superstar smirked.

Rolling her eyes, Taylor could only laugh.

"Yes, I will."

"Will what," the soon to be father asked hesitantly.

"Marry you silly."

Grinning, John carefully climbed into bed with Taylor, and pulled her into his arms.

"I love you baby girl," John whispered into her temple as Taylor began falling asleep.

"We love you too SuperCena."

Soon, the future parents fell asleep. John couldn't help but smile at the 'SuperCena' joke Taylor always made. Even Superman had a weakness. In John's case, it was Taylor Lynn Helmsley, and he would never want anything less.


End file.
